Wired For Noise

[A little old school Offspring for you in the title]

I’m addicted to sugar. Insanely, passionately addicted. It’s half the reason my butt is too big for most chairs and my gut hangs out of my shirts. Of course the other half of the reason is that I’m lazy, but that’s besides the point here.

I wish I could just say no, but I’m not half as strong as Christine to just put away the sweet stuff. Though considering I’ve quiting smoking and quit drugs I’m pretty sure this addiction is more about lack of want to change. I mean, why would I want to stop eating and drinking the yummy, fattening, so bad for m, packaged crap after the kids are in bed.

Oh, yeah.

Could it be the disgusting health effects, the eco-terror in the form of packaging, the cost of buying all those sugary treats? Nope, I’m vain so the answer would have to be the gut I’ve got. I mean, I’m a mom, I’m going to have a little extra lovin’ there but I’m bordering on ridiculous, and loathing it. And loathing Dearest’s mother whispering to him in the next room if I’m pregnant and blah blah blah. Don’t worry, not pregnant just fat. Is it sad that I almost wish I was just to have a better excuse for my bulging midsection?

Add to it the commercials for Hydroxycut coming on every ten minutes and we’re working on a recipe for some self-loathing. Just stir in a little “Gah, why can’t I just stop eating this crap!” to the “WTF? I can’t zip my jeans? I’m so fat!” and let bake in the summer sun where I’m too embarrassed to wear my cooler tops that show off too much belly rolls. Don’t forget a generous helping of body issues from the girl who used to look like this. And well, you get my point.

Now I’m upset and looking for the Twinkies to sooth me over. See? I’m addicted!

Tags: food, fat, body issues

I’ve been trying to sweet talk Dearest into an ice cream maker. When it heats up here we go through a lot of cold treats like popsicles and ice cream. Making popsicles is easy enough but I’m too scared to try to make ice cream on my own. I know some people make it in large coffee cans, but I’d feel better having a big machine to do it for me.

Isn’t that sad? I can make bread without needing a bread machine, I can make popcorn without having popcorn machines. But to make ice cream I get unsure of myself and want to blow money on a machine to do it for me.

I’d like to have one of these ice cream balls that you play with while making the ice cream. I have a feeling the boys would get a kick (ha!) out of rolling a ball around

I’m jumping into the Bloggy Giveaway here to offer some free snacks to some lucky moms out there. It your kids are anything like mine then yogurt is a one of the most requested treats in the house. Between the boys and myself we go through 6-8 cups each week.

So to share the yogurty goodness I’ve been given coupons for free 6 packs of Yoplait Kids Yogurt and told to spread them around. It’s yummy, healthy, and easy to serve when you’re in a rush. Plus it wipes up easily, which is a good thing if you have a food flinger like I do.

I have 20 coupons* to share among 10 lucky people. Each winner gets 2 coupons for the 6-packs of Yoplait Kids Yogurt. That’s 12 servings for free. See how generous I am?

All you have to do is leave me a comment here between April 21 and 25. On the 26th I’ll choose the 10 lucky winners at random from the comments and contact them.

I also have two other giveaways going on. Free books for creative, tree hugging kids and a free baby sling for any mama or mama-to-be.

* the coupons cannot be redeemed in California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Jersey, North Dakota and Tennessee.

I’ve been dreaming of a big garden this year. Lots of tomatoes and peppers and onions and everything else imaginable. I’ve been lovingly caring for my sweet little seedlings inside in a little plastic mini-greenhouse. Watering them, singing to them, anxiously waiting for Sunday morning to come. (Saturday night was the dark/new moon)

When the sun was up and the air was warming I took my green babies outside, lovingly planted them in my spot, watered them, even added some of the plant vitamin drink Christine brought me. Sure that they were happy in their new little home I went on about my day.

Around 4 PM I wandered over to check on them. And every tall, bright, beautiful stalk was drooped over, lifeless, near death. If there is any green left in the morning I’ll be surprised. Honestly I don’t know what I did. They were watered, not too much but not too litter, the soil was warm, the tide was rising, they had sunshine, vitamins, care.

And year 5 goes by that I’ve killed a garden before it’s even begun. I have some onion and carrot seeds left, but my tomatoes and peppers are gone. I surrender, I give up.

Tags: gardening, growing things, plants

Welcome to another wonderful Works For Me Wednesday. I thought since the weather is warming up, spring is coming, and some of us are getting our gardens started I would share a favorite recipe for you to use with those yummy goodies you harvest. This is my favorite veggie burger recipe, with slight tweaking so that Dearest will eat it without complaining. Too much at least.

• 1/2 cup sunflower seeds
• 1/2 cup peanut butter
• 1/2 cup grated carrots
• 1 cup rolled oats
• 1/2 cup chopped onions
• 1/2 cup diced spinach leaves
• 2 tsp sesame seeds
• 1/4 tsp sea salt
• 1/8 tsp rosemary
• 1/8 tsp basil
• 2 tsp ground flaxseed (you can find it at most health food stores)
• 1/4 cup water

Toast the sunflower seeds in a dry frying pan over a low-medium heat, stir constantly until browned. Remove seeds from pan and set aside. Combine in a medium bowl the peanut butter, carrots, oats, onions, spinach, sunflower and sesame seeds, sea salt, and herbs. Slowly stir in water and flax seed. Form into 1/2 inch patties and fry over medium heat. Be sure to oil the pan to prevent the patties from sticking.

These are so yummy and brown up nicely. I like to add a dollop of salsa to mine and eat it on a bun, but Dearest and the kids eat theirs’ like regular burgers. They don’t taste like burgers, obviously, but they still have a great flavor. Dearest didn’t like them the first time or two I made them, but quickly came around and learned to love them. The boys thought they were great from the start, especially with a slice of cheese melted over them. The best part is they are really healthy so no guilt over serving burgers and fries for dinner!

Tags: recipe, burgers, veggie burgers, food

How many of you drink milk? Do you buy it in the big plastic jugs? What do you do when you’ve finished off the milk in the jug? You could just through it in the trash or you could recycle it into something new. Here are 5 things that you can do with your empty milk jugs to reduce the amount of trash your family is creating.

1. Make a bird feeder.  They’re not the prettiest, but they are functional. Cut out a small hole along the side, about an inch and a half above the bottom. Then fill the bottom with some bird seed and string it from the handle to a tree branch. The plastic can get hot so you’ll want to hang it in a shady spot, especially if you live in a warm weather area.
2. Use them in your garden. Cut the bottom off and stick the top half over young plants to act as small greenhouses. While you’re at it use the bottom part as a place to start your seedlings in. Or leave them intact, fill with water, punch a few small holes in the bottoms, and sit them in your garden for a slow trickle of water onto your plants. You can clean and store these easily during the winter months and pull them out again each spring.
3. Make a container. Cut the top off at an angle so that the handle is in place and you can use them to hold things in. Clothes pins, small toys, you can even use this in the kitchen to hold your scraps for composting. If you have animals that reguire a lot of food this can also be used to scoop up their feed.
4. Use the sides. Cut large circles out of the sides to use for freezing burgers. If you mike to make a lot of burgers and freeze them for future use you can stick the plastic circles in between. It’s better than wax paper as you can reuse them again and again.
5. Save water. Fill empty milk jugs with water and stick in the tank of your toliet. It will automatically become a low-flow toliet, using less water with each flush. Of course less water also means a lower water bill each month, that’s my favorite part.

I’m sure there are hundreds of other great ideas for reusing your empty milk jugs, but these are some great places to start. For other great tips gor check out the Works For Me Wednesday post this week.

Tags: recycling, reusing, milk jugs, works for me wednesday

I’ve got more than just a little around my middle. I’m a bit like Santa Claus. You know, shakes like a bowl full of jelly. Even though my weight is still techniquelly in the OK range, it’s all sitting right in my waiste and hips making me look bigger than I am. You should never describe a woman’s body as a fruit, so I’ll use a vegetable and say I’m eggplant shaped. Not sexy.

I’ve probably tried a hundred times to lose the belly. I’m just not motivated enough to exercise alone and it’s hard to eat better when Dearest, the beanpole, brings home every package of junk food he sees. Oh sure, he can eat a brownie and a bag chips for breakfast then wash it down with a can of soda and not gain a pound. I get bigger just watching him. I even get bigger trying to get in shape. This week I’ve done crunches every day to try to thin my stomach but instead I actually gained another 5 lbs.

Since I don’t want to resort to things like ephedra diet pills and I can’t afford liposuction I need to just suck it up and put in a real effort. More exercise and more willpower and more motivation.

Tags: weight, weight loss, fat