I\'m Summer, a mouthy, sarcastic bitch. I\'m passionate about natural birth, long term breastfeeding, and living naturally. I curse too much, love tattoos, and will some day be crushed to death by my book collection. I homeschool, dream of gardening, and swing to the left. 
Discipline and Abuse
Maybe I’m too sensitive, but this just made me sick. Via Post-Tribune:
INDIANAPOLIS – The Indiana Supreme Court has reversed a woman’s 2006 battery conviction for whipping her 11-year-old son with a belt or extension cord, holding that she was reasonably exercising parental discipline.
In a 4-1 decision, the court ruled that Sophia Willis’ use of discipline did not cross the line into criminal conduct.
“In response to a charge of battery, Willis raised the defense of parental discipline privilege. Considering the totality of the circumstances, we are not persuaded that the State disproved the defense beyond a reasonable doubt,” Justice Robert D. Rucker wrote in Tuesday’s decision.
Beating an 11 year old with a belt or an extension cord is reasonable parental discipline? What???
First the boy was 11, to me that’s far too old for spanking on the bare butt. As a preteen there are far too many adult-like feeling coming up, and to have a nude body part associated with violence can lead to all sorts of issues later on.
Willis, a single mother, had her son remove his pants and then hit him five to seven times on the buttocks with an extension cord or belt, resulting in bruising.
Secondly hitting with a belt or an extension cord? Not cool on any level. And hard enough to leave bruises? I’m sorry, that’s not discipline. That’s abuse. Though, I don’t think any spanking (or what ever cute pet names you have for it) is discipline. It’s actually counterproductive to discipline.
The goal of parental discipline is to teach children self-discipline. If the only reason children have for not doing something wrong is the threat of being punished, then what guidelines will they have for acceptable behavior when no one is there to punish them? Hitting children when we catch them doing something wrong doesn’t teach them how to do what’s right; it teaches them that they need to be sneaky and to lie to avoid being caught.
Links:
- Project No Spank
- Does Spanking Equal Discipline?
- Ten Reasons Not To hit Your Kids
- Gentle Christian Parenting
- 9 Things to do Instead of Spanking
[tags]abuse, spanking, hitting, punishment, discipline, parenting[/tags]
I am absolutely amazed at how many older children still receive spankings. Last year at youth camp (YOUTH CAMP!), there was a girl that lost something fairly expensive. She was really upset because she just knew she’d get a spanking for it when she got home. Many of the other mothers were nodding along with her like, “Yeah, that might happen. So sorry, honey.”
My mind could not even wrap around that.
Saving allowance to pay to replace the item, or working it off … that would be a fabulous and valuable way to really guide that child in the real world.
My four-year-old snuck a piece of her sister’s gum a few months ago. She had to “pay her back” by doing one of her chores the next day. Practical. Productive. Great thought process. Restitution. All good, wonderful stuff. And I could find a way to make it work with a four-year-old!
Ugh. Sorry. I better just shut up.
EW! EW! EW!
Stories like this just make me MAD.
My step children received “discipline” with a belt,wooden spoons,sticks….anything and everything their mother could beat them with. That indeed is not discipline…it’s flat out abuse.Having them live with us, I see first hand the damage that style of “discipline” leaves on a person,even when they become young adults. When the goal of parenting is to raise children into well -adjusted ,kind and decent human beings who are responsible contributers to society, acting like the opposite of that doesn’t get the desired results.
Makes me sick to my stomach.
Smacking children shows lack of discipline by the adult. You see it happen and it is that adult who cannot control their emotions and lash out at their children. It does not help children to develop their own core discipline.
im 18, and i still get spanked.
(to scarlett.. if your 18 and still get spanked, than thats wrong.. theres no way in hell id get spanked now, except maybe by my boyfriend haha, i do whatever i want pretty much. when your 18, your an adult legally. and you could totally say thats sexual abuse.)
Spanking is defined as “the administration of one or two mild to moderate open hand ‘smacks’ with an open hand to the butt or extremities that does not cause physical harm”. I dont think that that is wrong in some cases, although it definitely should not be used always, only in a case where the child is over 2 and under 10 and has been pushin it and pushin it, and done something really bad. Always explain what they did wrong before the spanking and tell them you love them but they need to learn a lesson other than natural cause and effect, because in the real world if you do something really wrong thats illegal, you get alot worse than a spanking, you go to jail. I think its horrible that that woman used an extension cord, thats disgusting. But i disagree that spanking is always wrong, because in some cases it can be useful and not harmful if used properly. i got spanked as a child, but not all the time, and i turned out fine.