Parenting With A Broken Heart

Hello there! Like this post? Subscribe to the feed and get more giggles every day.

Last night Evan went to stay the night with his cousins. Then he stayed the day playing with his cousins, not coming home until after dinner in fact. When he finally came home I was ready to hug him and kiss him and tell him how much I missed him.

The feeling wasn’t mutual.

Instead I got an hour of being told that he doesn’t want to live here anymore, he doesn’t want me for a mom anymore, he doesn’t love me anymore, I’m never allowed to hug or kiss him again, on and on. The sad thing is how that’s to be expected. Anytime he sleeps over somewhere he comes back ready to disown me. First thing in the morning and right after a nap he hates me.

I keep telling myself that it’s just a new phase, that he’s pushing buttons, that he’s expressing that he missed me in his own way, that he really doesn’t mean any of it, that he’s trying to find ways to express his emotions. But it still hurts. It hurts a lot. Like a knife right into my heart.

You know, I was prepared to be the evil mom that he hated when he became a teenager. I expected the crazy teenage hormones to make him piece every inch of his face, dye his hair green, and roll his eyes at what a loser mom is while hiding in his room looking up natural acne treatments online. I remember my teen years, I could handle that backlash. What I never expected was this to come out now. He’s still practically my baby, and he can break my heart faster than anyone else could.

According to Dr. Robyn

Perhaps the most important thing for you to keep in mind while all this is happening is that your child doesn’t really hate you. So take a deep breath. Sometimes parents, too, need to remember to smell the flowers and blow away the clouds. After all, it’s likely that clear skies are on the horizon. (link)

Huh. Easier said than done.

[tags]parenting, kids, life, anger, hate[/tags]