I\'m Summer, a mouthy, sarcastic bitch. I\'m passionate about natural birth, long term breastfeeding, and living naturally. I curse too much, love tattoos, and will some day be crushed to death by my book collection. I homeschool, dream of gardening, and swing to the left. 
Spank Out Day
It’s late and I apologize, but today is/was National Spank out Day.
SpankOut Day USA was initiated in 1998 to give widespread attention to the need to end corporal punishment of children and to promote non-violent ways of teaching children appropriate behavior. EPOCH-USA (End Physical Punishment of Children) sponsors SpankOut Day USA on April 30th of each year. All parents, guardians, and caregivers are encouraged to refrain from hitting children on this day, and to seek alternative methods of discipline through programs available in community agencies, churches and schools.
I’m against spanking as a form of punishment. Despite the cute names people may like to use taking your hand to another human being is hitting. Hitting. Children should not be hit.
I’ve written before my thoughts that spanking does not equal discipline. Some people have the mistaken idea that a parent who does not spank simple lets their kids run wild without correcting or guiding them. This black and white, one way or the other type thought often prevents them from seeing the benefits of choosing not to hit my children, and the dangers of them choosing to hit theirs. I believe in disciplining children, not punishing.
My own reasons for not spanking are based in my reality. Spanking may teach my child to listen to me and obey me immediately, however that is not the kind of child I want and not the kind of child I hope to nurture. Rather than a person who obeys authority figures without question and respects his elders on nothing more than they are his elders, I hope to raise an adult who asks questions like why and learns to respect others because they have earned the respect by their actions. I also want my children to understand cause and effect. In my day to day life there are many things that I choose to do or not to do, and none of those decisions are based on fear of being hit. If I speed in my car, steal from the store, or break other people’s property nothing will result in being hit by those in charge. There is simply no basis in my daily life to explain doing to my child what I would not allow to happen to me. Children learn through example I cannot teach my children that their actions will be physically punished and then expect them not to do the same to others. Unfortunately my experiences have taught me that the child who is spanked at home is the one more likely to push or hit another child at the park. Even the lightest tap can be humiliating and embarrassing for the child, not something that any person of any age should experience.
As Doc says so bluntly:
There’s no recognized research that says that spanking is good for a child, and tons that say it isn’t. It’s a lazy, stupid way to parent.
For more information visit Project No Spank, The Center For Effective Discipline, and Gentle Christian Mothers. Also be sure to read what others have said about this issue at the Thinking Parent’s Wiki. Not sure what to do when spanking is taken out of the equasion? Enjoy this video of alternatives.
[tags]spanking, children, parenting, Spank Out Day[/tags]
Okay I hate to say this but I have proof that spanking does not work. I will admit it I spanked- hold my head in shame. More so because I was spanked- a learned trait- I didn’t work- yes I got the behavior to stop for that minute but never for good. Now I have been giving my son a stern voice and a time- out. THis has done more for him and me- he respects me more- we resolve our problems verbally, work out why he was being naughty- Great article summer-
Susan’s last blog post..Real Mom- Art Curator
Great article, Summer!
Lis Garrett’s last blog post..Advice Please (HELP!!)
I couldn’t agree more, Summer. I have spent 11 years not spanking my boys and I would have to say they’re all turning otu to be empathetic, thoughtful little guys. Disciplining without hitting requires more thought and sometimes more patience, as the results aren’t immediate. They are, however, longterm and promote good qualities as kids age into adults. And you know, if *I* don’t spank my kids, nobody needs to
The Maven’s last blog post..A conversation with Spawnling
Spanking is something that parents will resort to, when they’re overwhelmed and helpless. I can’t believe that a child leaves an adult so powerless that all they can think of is to spank. It’s that last resort thing. Don’t know how to argue, so let’s spank.
My kids don’t get spanked. Period! And they do quite well without it.
Ute’s last blog post..Ears on kids?
I hope when I get the chance I can move beyond spanking. Both Pete and I were spanked as children and I hope…I hope we can do better.